Revenge of the Pepper

Woke up one day to a challenge very silly
To test my ability to imbibe hot chilli
I’m Indian, used to spice, bring it on
Man, I’d live to regret the day I was born
We went from left to right on the Scoville scale
To see whether I’d pass and when I’d fail
From mild & sweet green, yellow, orange to angry red
As things became hotter, I became more & more afraid

At first, I was turned on by the quaint names
It was, after all, supposed to be just a game
Pimento, pasilla, pepadew, puya, purira, paprika
Pungent poblano, piri piri, pepperoncini, chilaca

Fresno, serrano, amarillo, guajillo, rocotillo
Jalapeno, tshololo, chimayo, tabasco, zia pueblo
Yatsufusa, tabiche, datil, sandia, santaka, fatalii
Chile de arbol, malagueta, shisito, murici and infinity

Friariello, rocoto, Guntur, dundicut, pequin
Aji panca, coronado, bird’s eye, cayenne
Congo red, shipkas, ancho, jwala, Tien Tsin
Red Amazon, murugi giant, oda, moruga scorpion

Sonora, Santa Fe, hidalgo, diablo grande, Anaheim
Japanese, Chinese, Thai, Mexican and American
Morita, chipotle, hatch, cascabel, Scotch Bonnet
Mirasol, chipotle, habanero, Aleppo, Madame Jeanette

Cumari do para, dedo de moca, Galapagoense
Yukari bakan, and more such mirth and nonsense
Closer home with the Naga viper and the ghost pepper
Is when I really started to sweat and quaver

No amount of milk or sweet could temper the fiery heat
I burned all the way from my tongue to my seat
One minute I was hahahahahahahaha…hot
But the next morning, I cried as I sat on the pot