Superfood Scramble

Veganism’s on the rise, soy & almond milk are in
Dairy of all kinds is a big sin
Barley, quinoa, organic are so yesterday
There are new-fangled fads having their say

So, encouraged by well-meaning kin and kithΒ 
All taken in by the superfood myth
I scanned the supermarket shelf
For my dose of wellness and health

Chia, flax, hemp, assorted nuts and seeds
What did they think I was, a bird indeed?
Continued sceptically down aisle by aisle
As they drew me in using their guile

Seaweed, kelp, pre and pro biotics
Unreal, I thought, and quite quixotic
Bulgur, buckwheat, spelt, teff, amaranth, native grains
Slowly but surely, I was being driven insane

Cold pressed virgin coconut oil and apple cider vinegar
Extract of elderflower, with virtues held very dear
Kombucha and a green powder called chlorella
Spirulina algae and something else called moringa

Dragon fruit and kale I knew, but I didn’t maca
And what on earth were camu camu, dulse and lucuma
There was more: yuzu, and a mushroom called chaga
A variety of green tea flavours including matcha

Fava beans, edamame, acai, goji & maqui berries
If I ate them, I guess I’d be very contemporary
But fonio, fish oil, freekeh and kamut?
I looked for a way out via a shortcutΒ 

I bypassed the black rice and baobab
Ducking the promises to go from flab to fab
Only to come across a flour made from crickets
And that’s when I almost kicked the bucket

Forget a long life, disease free and healthy
Insects are definitely not for squeamish me
Instead I took a detour for a Big Mac and fries
The only real superfoods I’ll have till the day I die

 

 

63 Comments

  1. I love the flow of words, the continuous rhythm and flow, and how you seemed to catch every single possible item in a ‘health food store’ including those that are apparently “so yesterday”. Quinoa is still my favorite! I enjoy the photograph, the liveliness and colors contained in all those little bowls.

    Liked by 2 people

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  2. I’m with you K! Chris Rock’s take on food allergies:
    β€œWe got so much food in America we’re allergic to food. Allergic to food! Hungry people ain’t allergic to shit. You think anyone in Rwanda’s got a fucking lactose intolerance?!”

    Liked by 1 person

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  3. Love it!

    Too bad I have dinner with my friend with a dairy allergy (not just lactose) on Mondays, and with my friend who’s allergic to soy, wheat, and mushrooms on Tuesdays…

    It leads to a lot of label reading for me. And eating chocolate truffles in front of them, because YUM.

    Liked by 1 person

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  4. Hahaha! Hilarious! I can totally understand why people turn to fast food, eating well has become so complicated! My advice though… good ole dal and roti will never steer you wrong! Well done my friend!

    Liked by 1 person

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